A humming word

  Kaifi Azmi road in Hyderabad is dedicated to a poet (Shabana Azmi's father, Kaifi Azmi). Whenever Google Maps reads out, I feel so proud that a poet has a name in the city. Hyderabad is known as the city of love because of the story of Bhagmathi and Quli Qutb Shah's love story. Combining these two, the poem came through me. It is selected in haiku universe as part of their valentine's day celebration. 

in a clasroom of 65 girls, it is not hard to discern the 'talking girls' - the last benchers ideally! pranking, talking aloud, bunking the class, stealing tiffin dabbas. before 2000s, it all seemed pretty cool, unknown of its effects in our lives and the other's. in today's parlance, we were not 'aware'. only years later, when one of the girls we pranked on reached out detailing her ordeal about our pranks did i realise, what we did. she was fine and she just detailed what we did to her affected her back then and how she dealt with it. what idiots we were but 'no one knew better'!  i wish i could tour around and apologize to everyone i wronged and wish i was a better human back then, but as i cannot do that for now, here's a piece recognizing that and as juvenile it may sound to make this confession in late 30s, it is important too. 

the year 2024 has been a year of love while feeling the pain of loss of dear ones. also, it has been the year of fulfilling dreams, travel, meeting friends and meeting self closer than the previous year.  the first few months were spent in shravan (my then boyfriend and now husband) meeting parents, looking for temples for wedding venues, scrambling time for completing mba studies, ananya coming to hyderabad, me traveling to bangalore to meet ananya who kindly hosted me and introduced me to her world in bangalore, and then we met shloka and aishwarya, and then a trip to kolkata to meet surela, a gracious host who ensures i see every bit of kolkata, met urbi who accompanied us to the lampshade kolkata reading - collab with penguin, thanks to patrichia and mayura ji for organizing it.  phew! time just flew... this year, i met pallabi who has become a dear friend of mine.  also, i moved from a full time job to a freelance one! i have been meaning to make this change since a ...

Ammamma. The word itself evokes memories for us. Her passing is the passing of a part of our childhood which we (my cousins and I) cherish. This is a piece for her. Ammamma is a telugu word to address mom's mom.  Ammamma lived in Chikkadpally, an area in the older part of Hyderabad, in one of those houses with multiple door entries, many windows in every room, and washroom that’s outside the house. Like Ammamma, the house was open, warm and welcoming. Anyone (whom we know ofcourse) could come inside and stay there as long as they wanted to. This was the 90s and perhaps due to the times we lived in, people were trusting of each other, children grew up in multiple households (grandparents’, aunts’, uncles’..). In our household, while there was emphasis on studies, there was emphasis on having fun too – be it watching movies, playing in the gully, studying and going to tuition together, or watching the Sunday Jungle Book together. Ammamma played a pivotal role in taking us to movi...

I don’t feel in full sentences anymore.   I feel in these emdashes in these semicolons in these commas and in these […]   punctuated by interruptions--- vehicular noise, a notification, a chirp a thought   I don’t feel in full sentences anymore    <draft 1 on the theme: concious living>    

Akaash Vani is a movie every person who has been raised on a diet of misplaced filial piety must watch. Filial Piety is a concept by Confucius which emphasises on love, care for the elderly. While the concept seems noble, the misuse of power seeps into relationships too.  Elders demand 'respect' by strangling needs of the young by expecting them to give up on what they value to 'fit in' in the society. The movie, Akaash Vani, is a story of this misplaced filial piety. The story is about Akaash and Vani, a girl and a boy, away from their home, studying in a university, and in love. They wish to get married and plan a future together. Beleiving that they will get married, Akaash pursues his higher studies and moves abroad to provide for Vani and himself. Meanwhile Vani returns home to learn that her sister has eloped with someone thus bringing the family dishonour.  To restore their honour, Vani's parents marry Vani to a man, who is well educated but has no emotional ...

  Bala and me Bala's presence at YK Antiques has been so impactful that when he left Hyderabad, it left a gaping hole. One that we cannot fill and thinking we can fill it is only foolish. His passion and love for YK Antiques is unparalled.  Satya, Bala and sir with Dobara team For the unitiated, YK Antiques is a home museum in Alwal, Hyderabad, and is run by YK Murthy and is supported by the love of volunteers -- Satya, Vinay, Preeti, Laalithya, among others.  And today, there was a School Tour to the museum. And personally, the presence of Bala's absence was felt. Before Bala moved to Goa, he spent most of his time at YK Antiques and he and YK Sir set the home museum with utmost care. Whenever there was a school tour, Bala would spontaneously conjure some fascinating activity.  And this time, it was we who had to do it. I knew it would be hard to fill in the shoes of Bala. And the next thing, I thought was to involve my mother, who is creative and spontaneous. The t...

For two months, for one hour, fortnightly, we would become kids and travel through a structured hindi writing program of poems, stories and writing exercises with Bansa Library kids.  Initially, when the program was being planned, I thought how would 4 sessions cover it all? But Garima ji planned it so well that each session was enriching. We wrote as a group at the end of the session too. And yes, there were a few hindrances.  Online Engagement. We know how many treat Online Meetings.  Yet, we managed to pull it off. Garima ji kept her camera on and so did the children and thus, we did too, atleast mostly. Also the interactive learning kept us going. Another hindrance was Homework. With the advent of latest tools, doing 'homework' has become close to not doing it at all or doing in the most convenient way. So after the first two sessions, Garima ji moved to a 'in the class writing' approach. That way the children don't have the pressure of writing outside and any i...

my father has a strict countenance. on the first meet, some may feel overwhelmed by his strict appearance but beneath all of that is a loving and compassionate man. often, i am at the receiving end of how can i be more compassionate and here are a few instances: my father loves his friends and the way he speaks to them, deeply involved about their welfare while not being too imposing, is something i love to learn from him. sometimes i get over-involved with my friends but i am learning to me mindful too. as my writing mentor and friend Urbi says, 'love people from a distance they are comfortable with'. my father exemplifies that.  whenever i have a disagreement, my father sides the one who is 'wrong' by gently correcting the person who has taken the position of power of being 'right'. he often says, it is about the change. focus on growth and not merely pointing to the mistake and taking the position of power if you're right. i learn this from my partner as ...

पढाई कबसे जूती बन गई ? जिसको पहनकार लगे है लम्बी दौड़ मैं | किसी की फूलती साँस को आराम देने के लिए उसे पानी भी ना पिलाएँ | पढाई हमें सज्जन बनाती हैं हमें जोड़े रखती हैं पर हम तो बेमतलब तोड़ने में लगे हैं || Thank you Shrey ma'am for your thoughts. Edited by Garima ji: पढ़ाई कबसे जूती बन गई ? जिसको पहनकर, लगे हैं लम्बी दौड़ में किसी की फूलती साँस को, थमकर पानी भी ना पिलाएँ ? पढ़ाई जन को सज्जन बनाती है, हमें जोड़े रखती हैं । पर हम तो तोड़ने में लगे हैं |

On a bright sunny day, a driver looks out of his window and sees a cyclist on the road. The driver acknowledges the cyclist’s right to a safe commute and makes sure to follow the road rules. The driver is pleased to witness someone showing concern for the environment and pledges to contribute more actively moving forward. Now let us come back to real life, where the situation is never this perfect. Underneath the sweltering hot sun, a person in a metallic box sees a person riding their bicycle and huffs contemptuously-” A fitness freak, no doubt. Don’t they know this is a fast-moving road? They are only endangering their lives” the driver remarks.  The cyclist, armed with protective gear and obeying all the laws, has no idea of the nuisance he has caused to the annoyed driver. As ironic as it may be, the reality is sadly disappointing. People choosing alternative and sustainable methods of transport are blamed for using the roads, while negligent motorists get away with a slap on t...

 फ़िल्मों ने बड़ा बदनाम किया,  लड़का और लड़की की दोस्ती को  ऊपर से बेकरी या कॉफ़ी शॉप में जो घूरते रहते हैं, दुपट्टा भी शर्मा जाए |     हमारी दोस्ती एक एनजीओ के प्रोग्राम से शुरू हुई । वो मुझसे छोटा था... पर बहुत समझदार ।  हम अक्सर लाइब्रेरी में मिलते  थे, किताबे पढ़ते थे ।  और फिर लाइब्रेरी से जुड़े एक कॉफी शॉप में बैठ, खूब सारी बातें करते थे । हर हफ्ते लाइब्रेरी और घर के बीच ये मुलाकात बढ़ने लगी । एक दिन उसने पूछा, कितना अच्छा होता अगर हम  ऐसे ही मिलते रहे । साल बीत गए...हम अपने-अपने रास्ते चल पड़े । और आज उसको जवाब देने का मन करता है । हा.. बहुत अच्छा होता । बिन मतलब के मिलते रहना । और किताब पढ़ना .. Note: This is written on the prompt by Garima Mishra ji at the May 19 Bansa Hindi Writing Program.  Thank you for helping with the edits too, Garima ji.

काश बचपन में ही सिखाया होता, अपना साथ कितना ज़रूरी होता है | इतने बरस हम ज़ाया न करते, जो नहीं है उनके याद में तड़पते हुए | रिश्तों की चिता को, प्यार की गर्मी समझते हुए | खुद को संभल हम भी निकल पड़ते,   अपने आप से ढेर से वादे करते,   उनको निभाते हुए दिन गुज़ारते | जाने कितने दिल टूटने से बच जाते | कितने लम्हे किसी को खोने के डर से, उसके होने के एहसास में बिताते |   काश बचपन में ही सिखाया होता, अपना साथ कितना ज़रूरी होता है,   अपना साथ कितना ज़रूरी होता है... Note: Shukriya Garima ji, Shrey ma'a for your thoughts.

I was never good at academics. I did not wish to run the rat race but rather play instead and have a fun time at school. I was inclined to reading though.  The love for reading was fueled by the chetak library uncle who would visit our apartments in Hyderabad and many other apartments in our galli. He was a pot-bellied, middle aged, medium height man who would ride a chetak and fill the dikki with books -- tattered comics that he would loan for 25 anna per week.  Few of our friends would borrow them and we would read it and exchange these books within that week. And then again wait for the chetak library uncle to come. This continued till we grew up and grew out of these books. The love for libraries and books were sowed though.  During high school, i'd follow the library principle in bookstores too and would read one or two there and pick another and come home. I would calculate, i read 3 at the price of one.  Growing up, i found a few libraries which were my home t...

  /inspired by Shravan's music piece/ clink clink (on a footpath) the bare wristed  bangle seller  * another round of chai! (a loud voice)  pours tea into a cup,  the emaciated chaiwala * outside KFC   a litter of puppies  watch children  share a bucket

This blog post is an ode to our supporters and friends who were gracious to open their doors for us.  Here are a few lessons learnt at Lampshade Readings.  Grateful to: In Hyderabad: MR uncle of MR bookstore, Rahul Reddy of Octospaces, Kavitha ji of Akshara bookstore, Zainab of Ofen, Yk Sir, Bala and team of YK Antiques, Abhilasha of Kaveh Qaneh, Team at Cafe Rasasvada (also, a home for books), Omana ma'am of Kaleidoscope, Shilpa and family of Luna books.  In Kolkata: Sonia and the team at Hip Hop Studio and now, Storyteller bookstore.  Little did we know that we would one day end up collaborating with Penguin Publishers by sheerly being ourselves and doing our bit. Thanks to Storyteller bookstore, Kolkata and our Kolkata family we are collaborating with Penguin Publishers for a Reading on 19-May.                                                Here ...

  Shloka Shankar, a Best of the Net nominee, Pushcart Prize nominee, and an award-winning haiku poet, is also an editor, publisher, and self-taught visual artist. But this conversation focuses on the community of artists and poets, she was instrumental in creating. And why? The collective will soon be launching their e-commerce store featuring art prints, framed prints, postcards, amigurumi dolls, crochet and macramé pieces. Come, let's understand how she and the community of artists and poets thought of this endeavor with a brief conversation with Shloka Shankar (SS). TBS: Please can you share your journey from a poetry group to an online store collective   SS: I started conducting online poetry workshops quite extensively during the pandemic and worked with various platforms, including  Lampshade Writers . It took a certain amount of faith to “go solo” and begin conducting workshops through my own website and brand,  bric-à-brac: the art & poetry shop. Along th...

Nita was born hearing to deaf parents. Living through the challenges of communicating on behalf of her parents with hearing people, After pursuing many things, eventually began working with deaf children. In 2019, she founded Yunikee & Sign Medium, with her husband, Chaithanya, and a friend, Rahul, to make life accessible for 60 million people in the deaf community in the country. She also runs International Deaf Academy that provides high quality education to children in the deaf community. Here’s a brief chit chat with Nita. Team Yunikee Please share your journey that led you to founding Yunikee. I was born hearing to deaf parents and all through my life, I experienced firsthand the challenges and struggles a deaf person goes through even in simple things that we take for granted. At a time when phones were not common and digital video calling was not even thought of, my parents had to communicate with hearing people, and I started interpreting for them as I grew up. But for a ...