A humming word

We make choices as per the changes in our life. we, as immigrant have to be vigilant of the surrounding predators.. Be it predators and/or prey.  We can be neither. Milwaukee and Waukesha has taught me that life is beyond relations and beyond all blood and water. It is about the emotion that: your space is yours. My space is mine.  Perhaps, I would have been blabbing about had I not met my husband, Raj Kumar. I would have been speaking about my life in tongues had I not met the Waukesha Open Poetry Group. Had I not met Jillian or Marley, who spoke to me despite their insecurities. Camaraderie? Companions?  Who are we – in the larger spaces of our life? Lost? When Pluto was demoted, poets like Gulzar and Paresh, my friend were shattered. We felt like why the ‘fuck’ should a planet be demoted? Why are we ‘feeling’ so much? Why are we thinking so much?

How does it feel when you go to your deepest fear and you overcome it? For me, fear can be sometimes good. Many times when I was successful, it was because I had a feeling of fear to lose. In other words, I hate losing. I hate losing more than I like winning. There is a difference. But sometimes, your fears dominate/hinder your confidence, your passion and your goals. This is where I think, we need to take a step and over come it. Early this summer, I decided to do something about my fears. I know what it is going to be. So I made my appointment with that thing! Those 7 days waiting for that thing, was Ike 7 years. I felt like time was running slow. All kinds of fears was building up. Thoughts of giving up too, occasionally. I was more convinced about myself - how many times I re-thought, re-calculated and many re’s before I wanted to do something big, something different.   Yet, I wanted to do it.   The day arrived. It was a fresh morning(even though I...

“Education is supposed to juice your curiosity, not diminish your curiosity.” – Walter Isaacson isn't that true? Life is what we make it. we, Indians, are inscrutable yet we are tough on the core. we may be a bore and we maybe too idiotic, neurotic, beastly and monastic. but we are 'indian' we sit on the floor and wear ghaghras to art museums; we wear skirts to bars and dance with our 'poola jada' (i dont) and wear ghungroo in any nation. we love to speak and we love to eat. give us a bunch of fruits, a couple of movies and friends and we are done for the day. we celebrate. we celibate. we love. we like. we never hate.

/sorry for spoiling the walls of the wall of a gender neutral virtual nation/ /thank you for gifting me a husband who is now a mother and a protector/ /Ma and her lap are the pillows of my dreams and light the lamp of my cold heart/ /i skip and hop through the city that likes me and find my spoilt laid back bratty city in it/ /we had mohalla and colony and gullies and ‘aage se left’ or ‘aage Se right’/ /we did not know where south of Hyderabad is our directions were two houses after Satish uncle’s Kirana stores where we bought candies for 25 paise and he slept like a log while we waited for him to open the shop in the noon/

fleeting rabbits invisible rooftops armchairs tea-stained crochet beckon me now O Kisna, the evening hues of your colors are now smothered on midwestern roads the lake paves the way now and the lighthouse slowly dims they sway to the tunes of 'tha-thira-kata-thai' the pin roll of the chapati maker against the granite floor neatly cut into chess board squares the pawns are lost the kings are wandering it is me and my empty field shall we write another story?